Times Change

The Texan Farmer A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and begins talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says,“Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large.”   Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the…

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, “What’s politics?” Dad says, ” Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me Capitalism. Your Mom, she’s the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the Government. We’re here to take care of your needs…

A blonde is explaining to her girlfriend the bad day she’d had at work, and that her boss had suffered a heart attack and died. “How horrible!” said the friend, “What did you do?” The blonde replies, “Well there was nothing I could do. He kept yelling at me to call 9-1-1, but he wouldn’t…

          Due to increasing products liability litigation,  American liquor manufacturershave accepted the FDA’s suggestion that the following warning labelsbe placed immediately on all containers: Warnings:           The consumption of alcohol may leave you  wonderingwhat the heck happened to your bra.           The consumption of alcohol may make you thinkyou are whispering when you are not.           The consumption…

We’ll just take the most prominent for example’s sake: $ Michael Jordan having “retired,” with $40 million in endorsements, makes $178,100 a day, working or not. $ If he sleeps 7 hours a night, he makes $52,000 every night while visions of sugarplums dance in his head. $ If he goes to see a movie,…